Whew... A lot has happened during this long period of disappearance... As usual... The mum not allowing the daughter to do this and do that... And interfering with all her personal life and stuff... I mean for God sake... I'm fucking 23!!! Not 3 nor 13... Give me a break please... So as usual... I was all moody and stuff with all the restrictions and stuff...

I was playing the lappy... online pool... and was about to blog... haven even typed anything cos i dunno wat to type... mum came around and questioned wat i was doing... i told her the truth... she den say everytime i play online pool it must be cos i wanna chat on msn... i mean it's like so wat if i was chatting on msn? right? and even if i wasn't playing online pool... does that mean i cant use msn? i dunno wat is this great big connections between msn and online pool... anyone enlighten me? den also she is against me blogging... so ok loh... she not happy den i turn off the bloody lappy and went to the room to sleep... den she say i give her attitude... i was like wat the fuck? i cant do anything i want and i cant even go to sleep... wat is this man... so we started arguing and quarrelling and she started bringing up things that happened 2 -3 years ago... well... i guess it hit my detonation nerve and yeah... i exploded... really shouted and stuff... den my dad came in to my room to check wat the commotion was all about and my mum started complaining to him... she pulled my shirt and this time i really blew my top... i've been her punch bag since young... never retaliated nor even struggled when she raises her hand on me... take note... NEVER... so this time i was like... "you dun fucking pull my shirt!!!" i shouted at her and i pushed her hand away... Alright... even my dad was shocked... yes i may look like i'm no push over when i'm outside but i never ever was violent towards my parents... my mum got so pissed she rained blows and kicks on me... i just let her hit... i started shouting at her... telling her how i really felt... how unfair she had been and stuff... how tough a life i was gg through... she merely said... "not happy den get out of the house!!!" that was it... i never wanted to leave the house was because i noe the family needed me... I'm not the oldest in the family but i had to behave like one cos my sis is dependent on the family after she met with an accident 2 years ago... since den... all the burden falls on me... anything and everything will be handled by me... all the stress and pressure... everything... but has the family even once said they appreciate my presence... no... never... i dun really care even if they dun feel that i do wat i can for the family... it's my responsibility... but at least treat me with fairness... that's all i asked for... is it too much? i dun even ask to go out with my friends cos i wanna spend the little time i have with my family... is this appreciated? no... they only say i only care for my own friends, myself and my job... wat is this thing against all my friends even? wat's wrong with glynis? wat's wrong with jiayi? wat's wrong with jessica and wei zhen? they are mere innocent young kids... sigh... the more i say... the worse i feel... so i shall not say anything else...

so yeah... that was the last straw... i've shifted out since last sunday... (30/4) Been roaming the streets at night and not having enough sleep... I only slept 3 nights... i finally found a place to put up and will be taking a look at the place later... if confirm den i'll have more or less settled down...

i'll like to thank a whole lot of pple who have shown me tremendous love and care during this one week... i apologise to have made u guys worried... i truly appreciate it... guys... if any of u need help... come to pert pert... pert pert can do one die die also will do for u... my promise...

alright... gotta end here... gonna take a look at my future room... adios amiegos...

:) cheers (:

xo/- 5:19 PM
Pertie :)